You lost your loved one. They were right there beside you living large; life was perfect. Then like the blink of an eye, they were gone. How are we supposed to process this as humans? The thing that “was your life” is no longer in your life. What do you do? How can you move on? What is right? What about what others believe; will their beliefs affect my moving forward? How do you take a “next step” in your life when everything you knew as your reality is gone?

You already know there is much mystery and magic to life. Just imagine birth itself. A seed and an egg merge. They grow into a living being. A seed is planted and a tree will grow. When you think about that, everything should feel pretty magical. So don’t think! If you try to “think” your way through life, it will be a challenge.

It doesn’t matter what your religious or spiritual training or upbringing has been. When it comes to life and death, you must leave it at the door. We all enter and exit this reality.

This is going to be something new that’s going to be almost impossible to wrap your thoughts around. I am asking you to listen. I am asking that you don’t “think.” Try to absorb without engaging your brain. You are worth it.

First and foremost, there are no rules on how to live on this planet. We make them up as we go. There is no right or wrong way to do anything. Please stop judging yourself and wondering if the way you’re mourning your loss is right or wrong. Absolutely not. We all experience living on this planet in our own unique way. It’s through our lens; from our lane only. We cannot nor would we want to change this. Give yourself grace and love yourself dearly for whatever you are feeling. You are feeling because you are a warm-blooded human being. You are blessed. Let’s see how you can make life even better than it’s ever been.

I met two beautiful souls experiencing the loss of their partners. They both have so much light inside, dying to shine, but they don’t know how to give themselves permission to move forward.

I’m talking about learning how to move on after the death of a loved one. Especially a partner. Somebody you knew how to live with. You knew how to share with. You knew how to exist with… and then suddenly they’re gone. Who are you without them?

I know talking about death is a no-no subject, but when you’re in the middle of mourning, you are desperate for answers. I have your answers. I can help you move beyond it.

We need to take it back to who we are. It’s a lot to grasp. Please hold on. It’s important information. Don’t think, just close your eyes and imagine the process.

Before we are born into these bodies, we make plans. We plan who we will be with. Who we need to bump into, or poke at us along the way to get us back on track. Who our family members will be. You decide if you will have children, and what your role is in their lives. You plan life altering tragedies. You each have a role in the event to get through. Including the victim of the tragedy. You sign up for this. You want to experience the role you are in. We all interchange and intermingle, but we plan it before we come here. When we come here, we forget everything.

The fact that I met the two people who inspired this message within days of each other is enough for me. I knew they had to hear me.

Every crazy, tragic and wonderful thing that happens along the way is something you planned to happen in your life. When you are on track, following your guidance, it takes you down your path.

The person you just lost was to be in your life for the exact amount of time they were. You had an agreement. It was time for them to go back to non-physical. They were done with their story here on earth and they went back home.

Death is not scary. We have made it into something dark and scary, yet we all have to face it. If we took the heat off of it, it wouldn’t be as tragic. It is not scary. The actual event of dying is like walking into another room. You literally are standing there, next thing you know your body is on the floor. But you are still standing there.

Having fearless conversations before you lose a loved one is critical. If you talk in advance, you can openly communicate while you are both breathing what signs you will look for – from them from the other side. Don’t fear having open conversations about the transition process. People don’t want to have the hard conversations. But you have to.

I flew from Seattle to Sedona. He flew from Massachusetts to Sedona. We met for a few hours on Thursday. He was there for only two days. We never even shook hands. We were going to run away together. He died eight weeks later. I lost touch with him. I met someone who was able to talk to him for me. She did and he explained everything. Two people ended up chatting with him on the other side. I got all of the answers I needed early. And now, he comes through me.

We were not supposed to be partners in this lifetime. We have spent many lives together in many roles. But he had to meet me before he died. It was the last thing in his soul contract that he agreed he would do before he crossed back over.

There were many reasons why we had to meet, and we did. Now from the other side, he has been my ghost writer for all of my work. The working title of the book I wrote about us was Homeless with a Dead Boyfriend. They are never gone. They are fully alive, much more than they were before.

We come to earth and we slip into a skin bag. We are actors on the stage. We are playing a role we designed before we were born. Once we incarnate, we forget everything. We come here to forget. We come here to hurt and be hurt. Then we go home and report back on how it felt to be on both ends of the emotions.

Your deceased loved ones are with you. They are trying to speak to you and reach out to you, but you are so busy being stuck in a story that no longer exists, you cannot hear them.

Alden and I had roses as the thing between us. After he died, I started ending up where there were rosebushes everywhere. Once you quiet your mind and allow yourself to feel their energy, you will hear their voice. It is subtle, but you have to be quiet to hear it. You can’t be quiet when you’re sad. You can’t change what happened. But you can change your experience.

Speak with them. They are right there with you. Talk to them about what you want to see as a sign from them. What can they communicate to you for you to believe they are there with you? Talk to them and ask them to show you. They are trying to talk to you. They can manipulate electricity, phones, clocks. Help them help you to see them.

Book one of my four-part series talks about death, life between lives and much more in great detail. It’s hard to comprehend and understand, I know. That’s why I wrote the book. We are so much more than our bodies. When you learn how to surrender, and allow yourself to point the way to where you are supposed to be, you will find something beautiful standing right before you that you never would’ve expected to show up. We are the only thing that gets in our way.

I had to be very silent and alone for the last two years. I have not been alone. I have felt Alden‘s presence in songs, bad jokes, and his energy. They are with us always. Turn toward them and send them love. Open your arms and open your heart and trust that we are eternal.

As Shakespeare said, “All the world’s a stage, and all the men and women merely players. They have their exits and their entrances; And one man in his time plays many parts.” We are merely actors on a stage. We are not aware of this because we come here to forget. I am trying to let you know that this is not a play. There will be many other players in your life. You are stuck and they cannot come to you. You stepped into these stories for a reason. You can step out of them just as quickly. Isn’t it worth it to try?

Your future is standing right there in front of you, but you can’t see it. You are still stuck in an old story so your future cannot appear. You set yourself up for greatness. You did not set yourself up for a backward step. If you trust that you have something amazing ahead of you, and you say, “I am worth it,” it will show up. Life will be magnificent when you say “yes” to you.

Think about this. We do for others all the time. We hope people do for us. When we start putting our needs first, when we start finding self-love as the way to take care of ourselves, the path unfolds. When we love our self, then we are lovable by all.

When I hated myself, nobody liked me. I wondered why.

When we trust that we made a plan for ourselves to continue to do more, even when the road gets rocky, the path opens up. When we get stuck in a story, we stall our moving forward progress. Do not stop your progress. You never know how long that thing will be right before you. Trust your gut. Follow your instinct. What makes you happy? Follow your happy and you will find your way home. They are with you. This is all they want. Do you think they want to see your life stopping because they are no longer there? If they could feel sadness, they would. But they are full of love and cheering you on from the other side. Please listen. Isn’t it worth it? Aren’t you worth it? They want you to get back to being alive.

In 2019, I started experiencing a new reality by communicating in the spiritual realm. My first experience was Barry. He was turning on my nightstand light. It happened for a while before I finally figured out it was Barry and he had crossed over.

Then a high school classmate came through me in a vision. He looked healthy, like he was in the prime of his life. I saw on Facebook two days later he lost his life that day.

Dealing with the other side was how this reality started for me. And then it moved on to many other aspects.

Often times I get messages from the other side, and I always send them to who they are intended. I always tell them this is just a message that came through, do not respond to me. Talk to them directly as they are listening. They come to me out of the blue. Roger reached out when I was in Wildwood Park hiking. He had a message for Dorothy. I sent the message. She did respond. She wanted to let me know that at that moment, she desperately needed it. I just send what I get.

There is a collective energy that wants to come through and send a letter to everyone who has lost someone that they love. You’re in a space where you’ve pushed your pause button. Your loved one had to move on and they want you to do the same. Here is a letter from your dearly departed.

A letter for the love I left behind.

My dearest darling. I am writing to you from the other side because you are not paying attention. I have been trying to reach you, but you are not listening.

There are so many things you cannot know until you are on this side of the veil. We waste too much of our time dwelling on things that do not matter. Anything beyond today does not matter. Anything beyond this moment doesn’t matter. This is truly the only moment you ever have. Right now.

But you can understand why you cannot let this feeling go. So much of you is twisted in knots because you do not know what you are supposed to do. There is the “what is the right thing, what will people think…” As opposed to what is best for me? We spend too much breathing time worrying about others and what they think. Ultimately, the only one you are responsible to keep happy is you, my love. And if you don’t do that for yourself, I cannot help you. I’m doing everything I can, but you are making it challenging.

There are so many reasons to hold onto yesterday. But holding on is a choice. This choice has stopped you from living.

I am here to tell you my dearest that we do not die. Earth is where we come to play in experiences. We come here to “feel” emotions, tragedy, success, and failure. We come to be rich and powerful, homeless and destitute. We come here to do it all. And then we come back home where there is no space, time, and everything is pure love. It is all energy. There is no lifetime or lifespan where we come from. It is a creation that we made to be human. We have a start and end date.

Where we are always, it’s eternity. We are all sparks of the same star. We are all light. We are consciousness. Consciousness is energy and it can never die. We are ageless and timeless.

We come to earth with a plan to learn lessons. To get through some of our stories and to come out on the other side successfully. Some of us blast through the various compartments and get to an awakening early on. Many others stop in their first story and call it a life. Some set themselves up for extreme challenges and tragedy, and they become the light workers. They walked through all of their intended yet tragic stories. Getting through them is what set them free. They found their way home. They had to have horrible things happen that set them up for failure. These strong people said, “no.” They walked through all of their stories. This is what you do to be rock solid strong.

As you know I had many compartments to walk through during my life. And I walked through them. That is how I was living. That is how you need to live. Step out of our old story. It is no longer here.

When we go to earth and we go through the story, and we learn the lesson, we never have to learn that lesson again. If not, we come back over and over again until we figure it out. I want to spare you darkness in your life because you can’t step into your next story. It is time to move on. You cannot hold onto me as I am no longer in the physical. But I am there. I am always there. You just need to speak to me. Let’s decide on something that will be our sign that I can easily show you, when you are ready. When you are ready, you will see it everywhere you go. It will be the magic you need to move onto your next step. Trust that love will take you all the way.

There is so much more life and love ahead for you. You cannot get stuck in memories of me and thoughts of me. I had my time on earth. It was magnificent. I had you by my side. We planned our adventure together. We also planned my departure. You planned to get through it quickly. You have so much more work to do here on this planet.

Do not wallow in sorrow and sadness. We had an incredible love story and partnership that you will never forget. But you have so much more life ahead of you. Do not let thoughts of me be the thing that holds you from living your life. I am right here with you. Talk to me. Share with me what you’re thinking and feeling. Tell me you are learning to love yourself and you are ready to take control of your existence. You are ready to move forward and stop carrying this mountain with you.

The longer you hold onto a story that is no longer, the longer it will take to move beyond it. The day you choose life, and put you first for once, it will be the first day of the rest of your life. Stop the thoughts, don’t feel sorry for yourself, you are here for a much bigger purpose. There are plans for you. That is why you are still here. Don’t stop yourself from moving forward. There is so much beauty ahead of you. You need to close the door to the past, say hello to those on the other side. We are always together. We just can’t remember this while we are human. I am asking that you find a way to be at peace with being right here, right now. You still are alive my love! Please live.

Here are the only choices you have. You can enjoy being right here, right now, because this is the only moment you have. Or… You can wallow in yesterday and ‘what was,’ and see if you can bring me back. It is your choice. Everything is a choice. What are you going to decide? What would make you feel good inside? You must go for the good feelings. Finding even the slightest bit of gratitude when life is sad is what will lift you to the heavens. Find gratitude in what we had. Find happy memories and allow yourself to smile. Smile and be grateful that we had so many precious times together. The gratitude will help you move from the sadness.

Those songs you hear that you wonder if they are from me, they are. All of those little things that happen and you wonder… Is that you? Yes. Stop wondering. Surrender to it. Trust it.

This is the time in your life when miracles are going to show up before you. Do not discount them. They are put before you for a reason. You have so much life ahead of you. Say yes to the miracle. Find where it takes you.

You are still alive. You are there to be with the living and to live. You are still in your human skin. I am right there with you and I always have been. We have always been together. I just had to drop my human form. Talk to me anytime.

You have to choose to go another way. The way you are going clearly is not working for you. Choose happiness. Not being happy stops your life. To live we must find that space of love inside of our hearts. We must know that we have a purpose. Our purpose is not gone when we lose anyone. We must find our way back to ourselves. Each one of us came with our internal guidance showing us our path. We need to get our needle back in our intended groove. The world needs your gift. After all, you’ve been letting me shine our entire life. It’s your time to shine, baby. Take your stage and start your show. Make the rest of your life about you.

We can’t know what it’s like over here until we’re back here. This is home. It is here where we make our plans for lessons we want to learn in our next incarnation. I am home. You are still there. You are not done living my dear. Please don’t stop living because something is missing. If you look in your heart, you will find I am always there. Rearrange the house. Make it yours. Make it fresh and new. Open the doors and windows.

While I was living my extraordinary life out loud, you were my rock. You supported me and lifted me and kept me strong. I don’t know how life would’ve been without you in it. That was a big role you had to fill. And now, you feel lost. Who do you lift? What is next for you? There is so much ahead for you, my sweet love. You have got to stop living in what can’t be and start moving toward your future. You have so much more ahead for you. This is why you are still here. My work here was done. I did everything I came to do. It was time for me to move on. This is your time.

You are so good at loving, lifting, and supporting. Don’t let me be the last one you share that part of you with. You have many years ahead of you. How do you want to spend them? With a smile and a promise or sadness over something that once was.


Please do you the honor of living your life. Anything you’ve ever wanted to see or do or be, it is your time. Please live out loud. You know I did. I didn’t hold anything back. I put it all out there. It’s time you do that as well. There were so many things I know you wanted, but you always put my needs first. Now is your time, baby. Don’t have any regrets when your time comes. Anything you dreamed about while I was around that you didn’t do, go do it!

Love you to the moon and back,… and I actually mean it. 

With love always….


If you’ve lost a loved one, this story read to you on YouTube will help. It is the story of Michael Thomas and the Seven Houses he must go through. When he gets to the red house… please listen. This is as close to reality as it can get. 

I did this video a few years ago. I talk about how we plan our lives before we come here.