And I would do anything to have him back in my life. But it would have to stop right there. It could not go one step further. It could not talk about the future. It could only be the present. Too much water is under the bridge. Too much broken has been exposed. Too much pain has been revealed. Someone has a lot of work to do.

The way we met is what made our relationship spectacular. The way we met allowed us to develop into something you cannot find in the real world. It just unfolded slowly, beautifully, and gradually. It was perfection. Everything about it was ‘ed-zachary’ as it had to be. Part of me always realized no one would ever be fully ready for me. No one can really know me. I truly am that tippy top line of every emotion scale. Bliss. It is where I stay.

Unless somebody has watched every video I’ve ever made and read every post I’ve ever written, they will not be able to comprehend who I am. They can’t. My human brain can’t wrap around it. I know a normal person functioning in the third dimension cannot begin to comprehend my reality.

Many people can’t even comprehend what it is like simply to live in the present. And that is also part of my reality. I don’t think about tomorrow. I don’t think about yesterday. I don’t think about you. I don’t think about anybody. I don’t need to. I am right here right now. Nothing else matters. Why can’t people wrap their brains around this? What I do next always comes from my higher self. The “receiving guidance” thing doesn’t even have to happen anymore. I go as directed.

I also can only speak the truth. I am in the fifth dimension. I don’t operate from the third- or fourth-dimension level; I cannot. I can visit, but I will never plant roots there again. It is impossible.

Our conversation started on Facebook about possibly sailing upriver together to see a show. It couldn’t happen, but clearly, it was something I would have done. I have no fear.

We started chatting. We were on Messenger. We started having intense conversations. We would take pictures of things and send them to each other. We learned that we loved the same things. Over time we got deeper and deeper in conversation. We were sending voice messages back and forth as well as text. There was no phone conversation ever. We kept this on Messenger. It just evolved that way, and we let it stay there.

I didn’t know what he looked like. I had an idea from Facebook, but he was very vague. I knew he knew what I looked like, as he had seen videos of me and saw me on the street. I saw what I saw in my visions. I knew who he was from previous lives with him on this planet. We have shared many lives.

I was getting to know the soul and the spirit. It did not matter who showed up in the human suit. I knew it would not ever matter.

It mattered to him, unfortunately. He did not like how he looked, but he was changing before my eyes. He was becoming what he saw himself as.

We started our conversations on February 17. With much guidance from God and many discussions with him over the weeks when I first met him, God made it clear he was driving when we were to meet. Not a day before. When I thought I would pull the trigger early, he got sick. We knew we had to stay on course. So we did.

What happened on Messenger was magical. I fell in love with someone who I knew I would know forever. We were so exact for each other. We loved all of the same things. Everything was beautiful and magical, and perfect. Until we tried to meet in human form.

He couldn’t possibly understand how someone could always be so authentic and honest. He couldn’t wrap his brain around it. I had no story. I was ‘What you see is what you get.’ Most humans can’t stand this. They need to know the story.

He started doing research on my Facebook page to piece me together. He was creating illusions with people I’d never met. It became tragic. The thoughts going through his mind were destroying us. I told him early on and repeatedly, before and after we met… The only thing that can come between us will be thoughts in his head. And that is ed-zachary what happened.

And now I yearn for my Messenger partner. Those were the best days of my life. I had conversations with my mirror image. He was my best friend. He knew me better than I knew myself. We were both mirrors of each other.

We can’t be together as we are in this lifetime. He has to wake up. He has to be able to see life through a different lens. But we were magical together. We truly were. His thoughts killed us.

When you meet someone this way, you expose yourself completely. If, along the way, at any point, they say something that doesn’t settle well with you, you move on. No hearts are broken. Think about it. We started chatting on February 17. On March 25, we met for the first time. We really had a lot of long conversations where multiple layers of ourselves were exposed. Many things were put out there that, if we weren’t meant to be, the other would have tucked tail and ran. But we didn’t. We kept growing. 

If you want to find a partner and eliminate all of the other possibilities, I highly recommend trying this. Text and voice messages only. No conversations. You are both worth the wait. Be patient. What is the hurry? You’ve waited this long. Take your time. Listen to God.  Really allow yourselves to open up.

If love develops, there’s something there. Then you can expose all of the really hard truths before you ever meet this person. Everything can be put out there on the table before you see each other’s eyes in person.

We had this experience. Unfortunately, I have evolved to a space That creates too much of a division between the two of us. He can elevate. He has the power in his ruby slippers. You all do.

I find it wild that when I thought I would write a rant about crazy human behavior, I was guided to put this piece together about him, my twin flame. Nothing at all about the stuff humans are up to.

He is very heavily in my space. I find very often during the day, things happen that I want to share with him. I then remember that he isn’t in my life, and I don’t have that option.

When I first started seeing him, sometimes I saw him as his human self. More often than not, I saw him as his higher self, his spirit. The one that I had conversations with when we weren’t together.

I had a picture on my laptop that took me right to that man – the spirit. The one that knew the human-self-man had a lot of work to do, but he was fighting from the inside to come out. We both knew how good it could be together; we saw the vision. We knew what the plan was. But the human man took over. The brain and the thoughts took over. They destroyed any chance of us. We operate in different layers of life. It cannot be.

So now, when I think about that beautiful man on Messenger, it’s as if I was talking to his spirit. We hadn’t met the human version of ourselves yet. I wish to go back to that. I wish we could.

We came into this life to connect – and we have.