I’ve truly gone from abused to zen.
I haven’t published a blog post since December 12th, 2016. The last one I wrote was about my former step-son who is preparing for his federal prison sentencing this month for kidnapping! Other than that, I’ve had nothing to say. Zip… zero! Me? Weird!
Its not that I haven’t been writing, I have written post after post. They just all sit in “edit” mode. I haven’t beaten myself up over not finishing a post, I have just been looking back at my month and wondering why nothing has gone out.
It hit me why I’m not writing anything! Finally, during my hot-tub meditation, the answer came to me – well, because I asked.
The reason I haven’t pressed “publish” on a blog post since then is, well to be quite honest, my message has changed!
I don’t think most people are going to be able to wrap their brains around the new words I have to share. The funny thing is, that’s completely okay. I allow myself to evolve every day and lately, this growth has been flying like lightspeed. I allow myself this change and embrace it.
My message has changed!
When I look back at the many lives I’ve lived already this lifetime; I am pretty blown away by my transformation. If I hadn’t lived it, I wouldn’t believe any of it was the same person as the woman I am today.
From 3 until 10-years old, I was physically, sexually, and emotionally abused and tortured. I watched my mother, sisters, and animals as they were abused; something no child should ever have to see.
From 10-30, I didn’t know how to function. To this day I am shocked that I survived most of the things I put myself through. I tried to live a “normal” life, but without a role model, I didn’t know what that looked like, but I tried! Three times suicide was the only answer and obviously, all three times, I was internally encouraged to keep moving forward. Never was it from an outside force; it always came from within.
At 31, I found a magic potion, and I allowed the transformation to begin… I opened pandora’s box.
Once you begin your expansion, you cannot stop it. Following the steps of my inner guidance, I have walked away from people and situations that I knew were no longer in alignment with who I am. I have allowed myself to become at peace with all things on this planet.
I found a magic potion, and I allowed the transformation to begin… I opened pandora’s box.
Although I thought I might be as zen-like and clear as I possibly could be, surprisingly, I have reached yet another level of consciousness that I didn’t know existed.
As I write this post on this chilly Saturday morning, I know why my writing has stopped. I took the month off, without intending to, and have allowed myself to grow. I have spent more time in meditation and listening to myself.
I have found that I live inside of the Vortex of being completely vibrationally aligned with myself. I have learned to live in a world where I know thoughts become things – always. I no longer have to be careful of what I think about because I don’t allow negative thoughts to enter my head.
I started learning that we can choose to be happy or to be sad. We choose whether to go right or to go left. When you begin with these choices and make the ones that you know are completely right for the direction you want to go, you’ll find yourself in alignment with who you really are. It’s brilliant!
Once you decide to live in a world where you are always feeling happy and at peace, you don’t allow negative energy to come inside ever again. It all happens when you allow it.
For many, this is a language you are unable to accept because you still need to embrace your darkness. I urge you to let go of the darkness because after you do, you will discover it was a place you never had to be in the first place – and you will also understand it was a choice.
Choose love. Choose light. Choose to be listen to yourself and be authentic. Choose to be completely 100% who you are meant to be. It’s beautiful up here. It’s like living in heaven on Earth. Why wouldn’t you want to live here?